BY STEPHEN SINCLAIR
A friend of mine, a young man who always seems optimistic and full of life, recently told me he was feeling “blah” and kind of “down.” When I asked what he thought was the cause of this, he said he didn’t know, that he hadn’t ever felt this way.
I asked him several questions hoping to get an understanding of what he was experiencing. It seemed he’d lost interest in the activities that normally brought him joy. After talking some more it became apparent that he was experiencing malaise, the cause of which was being overly busy and not taking time for solitude and rest.
I know how that feels! I also sometimes feel out of sorts, even hopeless and despondent. Being retired from one’s career, newly single due to the death of a partner, or feeling that, as an elder, our options are more limited, can weigh heavily on us and keep us from feeling that we do, indeed, have a place in the world. Perhaps not the place we once had, but one that can still be meaningful and purpose driven.
What I have found is that if I don’t quickly do something when I’m feeling socially isolated or begin thinking I’m no longer needed in the world, I can get pulled down into depression.
Sometimes life can just wear us down. We may easily become overwhelmed. The thought of having to leave our house or apartment and run errands, attend meetings, or get to medical appointments is just too much. Performing the simplest of tasks becomes difficult. We no longer want to go out into the world. It’s just easier to stay at home and hope something will change.
I once heard a young woman talking about how she had trouble getting dressed in the morning and often spent the day on her couch rather than getting out and doing what she needed to do. She said, “I know this might sound simplistic, but what I have to do to get up off the couch and dressed is to say out loud, ‘up and out!’” She went on to explain how it’s like a mantra she repeats over and over in order to hoist herself up, walk to the bedroom, find some clothes, go to the bathroom, put on makeup, get dressed, find her purse, and walk out the door.
“Up and out!” “Up and out!” “Up and out!”
I can relate to that. To this day I can find myself on a metaphorical couch, unable to do what I know I need to do in order to get on with my life.
I also had a friend, now gone, who, after a stroke, was aphasic and didn’t have full use of one side of his body. Despite this he got up every morning, showered, shaved, and dressed as if for work. He knew that if he didn’t, he would slowly give up on life.
In the Book of John there’s a story where Jesus encounters a lame man who’s been lying for many years beneath the portico surrounding a pool of water that was believed to have healing powers. The man told Jesus he had no one to help him get up and make it into the water.
In response Jesus says, “Stand up, take your mat and walk.” He did and was healed. Jesus seems to have touched something in the man that rekindled his ability to motivate himself to take action. The fire within him was reignited, which then gave him the impetus to overcome what ailed him and to then begin to live again.
When the young woman said aloud “up and out” she called on a source within herself to overcome her lethargy. My friend used his willpower and determination to keep himself going. The man by the pool asked for help to be restored to wholeness and he was.
No matter our situation, we, too, can summon the resources within ourselves needed to become motivated and energized. If it seems too overwhelming, we can ask for help from loved ones, caregivers, or a higher power.
And remember: “Up and out, up and out, up and out!”
Stephen Sinclair holds a Master of Divinity from Meadville Lombard Theological School in Chicago, and is an ordained Unitarian Universalist minister. He’s been a pastor and chaplain in a number of churches and hospitals in the U.S., and has worked with the homeless. He lives on Capitol Hill in Seattle.
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